A Picture Says a Thousand Words, or Whatever

Yesterday was not a good day.

Why was it not a good day? Not because Spawnling isn't doing well, because he is.

Not because the gremlins had their claws out around the nice(r) furniture, because they didn't.

Not because I didn't have help with the three horned ones all afternoon from The Madre, because I did (Thanks again, Madre!)

No. The reason it wasn't a good day is because I am a giant tool and didn't follow my own advice.

When it comes to health, I believe there is a fine line between being informed and having too much information. For example, when doctors were scrambling to figure out what was wrong with Spawnling and the words 'Kawasaki Disease' were thrown into the mix, I quickly grabbed a cup of coffee from the hospital cafeteria and diligently researched the disease - along with a few others they had brought up as possibilities - on my laptop. I became an informed parent, which is important if you're going to not only make the best decisions for your sick child, but also knock the medical staff's lab coats off with your (newly acquired) vast knowledge of auto-immune disorders. By the time doctors had about reached a diagnosis, I was well aware of what we needed to do to make him better and jumped on the treatment bandwagon with bells on.

And I felt pretty damn proud of myself, I might add, because not only had I taken the time to research everything and make the right decisions, but I also took the time to apply lipstick that day. Mothers who wear lipstick in the hospital appear really put together even when we're nervous wrecks just trying to fake it. Also, I had the cutest little barrettes that did a great job at accentuating the red in my hair...

Sorry, where was I?

Right. Research. Knowledge. Power!

So, Spawnling is on a low dose of aspirin for the next few weeks to help prevent heart complications. Theoretically, when he gets the 'all clear' at his next echo in about five weeks, he'll stop taking it. A few times before he was discharged, and once when I filled the prescription, I was told he needed to stop taking aspirin if he got a viral infection, like the flu or chicken pox. Otherwise, he could potentially develop something called 'Reye's Syndrome'.

That was brought up three or four times, I realized yesterday as I was thinking about things. Hmm. Interesting.

I could have stopped there. I could have been an ignorant-but-still-lipstick-wearing mother who remembered the important thing in all of this: If your child get sick stop giving him aspirin. That's the long and short of it, isn't it? I needn't know more. I needn't ask questions. I knew, in the recesses of my exhausted little mind, that knowing might be bad.

But, in typical Maven fashion, I just had to create a bit of drama just as things are starting to calm down. So I Googled 'Reye's Syndrome'.

Ever Google 'Reye's Syndrome'? Don't do it, man. It's not worth it. You do not want to know what can happen if your child gets it. And it doesn't matter if the chances of contracting the syndrome are minuscule. It doesn't matter if only about two people a year get it in the US because developing it is that exceptional.

None of that matters because, after you read it, you will be frightened. And, if your child has to take aspirin for medical reasons - the one thing they know increases your chances of getting Reye's Syndrome - you will be positively terrified.

And poof! just like that, you're a hyperventilating paranoid freak dashing out of the house to buy hand sanitizer so you can make

every

single

person

who comes into your home use it upon entry so your baby doesn't die after a rare health issue from an even rarer one. Because wouldn't that seriously suck?

(Did Meanie mention Post Traumatic Stress to me the other day? I believe that woman should be a psychiatrist. And, if she wants to incorporate her current career into the new one, she could be a mean psychiatrist.)

Anyway, while I was at the store I, um, picked up a few extra things. It wasn't until I got home and started taking it out of the bag that I realized how easily my day could be summed up in a single shopping trip:


And yes. I did enjoy eating my feelings, and the carrots were, indeed, purchased out of guilt. (I'm nothing if not honest.)

If I'm not careful I'm going to have to start taking aspirin for my heart, too.

... And then we'll both get Reye's Syndrome! Shit.