Because I'm only going on about nine hours of sleep in a 48 hour period, I'm not nearly coherent enough to write a post with meaning. Therefore I will share some tidbits I've picked up along the shoulder of the crazy highway of my life.
- Roadkill are not the same as tidbits. They are less useful and smellier. Do not pick up any roadkill.
- Popcorn laced with trans fat tastes significantly better than low-fat, trans-fat free, diet popcorn. The two bowls I shared this week may send me to an early grave, but it will be a much saltier, tasty grave.
- A five-year-old boy with a pair of plastic handcuffs will not stop at simply arresting family members, but also inanimate objects, such as chairs and television stands.
- Coffee in a $250 coffee maker tastes better than one in a $50 one, even if the $50 one has blue LED lights that make it sexier than its rich cousin. I will covet mine neighbour's coffee maker in such instances, although will stop short of actually stealing it (mostly because it wouldn't fit inconspicuously under my clothes)
- Nearly 32-year-old women should not - I repeat, NOT - stay up until 4:30AM unless they are doing one of the following: giving birth, driving non-stop while the kids are sleeping, or packing an entire year of sex into a single night. Any other reason might seem like a good idea at the time, but no amount of coffee from a $250 coffee maker is going to make your grammar anything but shoddy when you're blogging the next evening.
- Uncles with latte machines at their cottages are very, very useful after two nights of staying up late playing sleep-over (minus the sleep) at a friend's house.
- Having a husband who makes pizza and low fat ceasar salad for dinner on nights like tonight is what marriage is all about.
- Sure, he spent close to $200 on some generator, UPS thing-a-ma-doodle for the servers while I was gone, but I just don't care because I'm blogging and he's cooking and we're watching a movie while we eat and then I get to have a bath and go to bed early and my gosh I love that man.
- It's very easy to run out of things to write about when you're tired and you have a trashy novel like The Other Boleyn Girl beckoning to you on the bed (thanks, Pixie!)
- It's pretty damn impressive that I've written this much in a week. Now I just have to start reading everyone else on a regular basis before I get hung from a network cable by my toes and beaten by my fellow bloggers. Eep!
- Roadkill are not the same as tidbits. They are less useful and smellier. Do not pick up any roadkill.
- Popcorn laced with trans fat tastes significantly better than low-fat, trans-fat free, diet popcorn. The two bowls I shared this week may send me to an early grave, but it will be a much saltier, tasty grave.
- A five-year-old boy with a pair of plastic handcuffs will not stop at simply arresting family members, but also inanimate objects, such as chairs and television stands.
- Coffee in a $250 coffee maker tastes better than one in a $50 one, even if the $50 one has blue LED lights that make it sexier than its rich cousin. I will covet mine neighbour's coffee maker in such instances, although will stop short of actually stealing it (mostly because it wouldn't fit inconspicuously under my clothes)
- Nearly 32-year-old women should not - I repeat, NOT - stay up until 4:30AM unless they are doing one of the following: giving birth, driving non-stop while the kids are sleeping, or packing an entire year of sex into a single night. Any other reason might seem like a good idea at the time, but no amount of coffee from a $250 coffee maker is going to make your grammar anything but shoddy when you're blogging the next evening.
- Uncles with latte machines at their cottages are very, very useful after two nights of staying up late playing sleep-over (minus the sleep) at a friend's house.
- Having a husband who makes pizza and low fat ceasar salad for dinner on nights like tonight is what marriage is all about.
- Sure, he spent close to $200 on some generator, UPS thing-a-ma-doodle for the servers while I was gone, but I just don't care because I'm blogging and he's cooking and we're watching a movie while we eat and then I get to have a bath and go to bed early and my gosh I love that man.
- It's very easy to run out of things to write about when you're tired and you have a trashy novel like The Other Boleyn Girl beckoning to you on the bed (thanks, Pixie!)
- It's pretty damn impressive that I've written this much in a week. Now I just have to start reading everyone else on a regular basis before I get hung from a network cable by my toes and beaten by my fellow bloggers. Eep!