It's 7:30PM. Do you know where your Maven is?
Why, still hanging out in the boonies with The Butler Did it and crew! We were supposed to go home this morning after driving the poor girl to an early grave, remember? I hear there were some betting pools going in my favour. You're not going to like how much money I lost you.
Lo and behold I was blindsided with someone as resilient as the kittens Spawnling has been found dragging around this house by their ears (no, really - he's evil, I tell you!). She actually asked if we would like to stay another night.
I laughed out loud at first and figured she must be either the most patient soul on the planet, or a cannibal hell bent on turning us into country charm meatloaf surprise. Then I realized she was serious. She hasn't simply tolerated us for the last day and a half, but seemingly enjoyed our company.
Who on earth enjoys our company? Who, I tell you?
When they cannonize the next saint, she will surely be Saint The Butler Did it. She even let me have a shower this evening when I was fading fast. I was on my way up to the roof myself when she intercepted and offered some sanity through hygiene and coffee.
Why was I in desperate need of some R&R? It could have something to do with the six horned fiends we've been herding since yesterday. It could also be the giggling fits we had while watching horrible movies (ever see The Ruins? Don't. Man-eating plants do not make for compelling horror anymore, Ben Stiller. Way to produce a movie). We were up until 3:30AM and up again less than six hours later with a hungry horde to feed.
Oh, sure. You may be very jealous that she's been able to spend this much time with yours truly. Two whole days with The Maven is the stuff legends are made of! But she's also seen the ugly side of me: the racoon eyes after my makeup runs at the beach, the grunts and morning shuffle to the coffee maker (that I taught her how to use - she doesn't drink coffee! I've curbed my prejudice in this one case and have accepted her presence despite that glaring character flaw), the need to check for blog comments three times the day to confirm that I am loved and frequently read (only five people have loved me in the last 48 hours). There are so many things that make me unbearably... me. Temporarily shacking up with me makes these glaringly obvious.
Maybe Geekster hired her to do away with me in my sleep and she was too tired to pull it off yesterday. According to reports from my husband this morning, he was given a new laptop from work yesterday and is enjoying the quiet time setting it up.
That could be code for 'porn', but I'm more inclined to think otherwise. Geekster is all about the dual boot partitions for Linux and Windows. That's way sexier than naked ladies to him.
Well, not really, but it's a close race. Maybe he'll set it up and then check out the nakedness.
No weight report today. I dare not weigh myself after last night's popcorn and chocolate incident. Let's pretend that my lack of sleep means I burned more calories alongside constant giggling over flesh-munching plants in horrid films.
Yeah, that's it.
I should probably go help her clean or parent my kids or something. That would be the right thing to do.
... So I'll check Facebook first.
Why, still hanging out in the boonies with The Butler Did it and crew! We were supposed to go home this morning after driving the poor girl to an early grave, remember? I hear there were some betting pools going in my favour. You're not going to like how much money I lost you.
Lo and behold I was blindsided with someone as resilient as the kittens Spawnling has been found dragging around this house by their ears (no, really - he's evil, I tell you!). She actually asked if we would like to stay another night.
I laughed out loud at first and figured she must be either the most patient soul on the planet, or a cannibal hell bent on turning us into country charm meatloaf surprise. Then I realized she was serious. She hasn't simply tolerated us for the last day and a half, but seemingly enjoyed our company.
Who on earth enjoys our company? Who, I tell you?
When they cannonize the next saint, she will surely be Saint The Butler Did it. She even let me have a shower this evening when I was fading fast. I was on my way up to the roof myself when she intercepted and offered some sanity through hygiene and coffee.
Why was I in desperate need of some R&R? It could have something to do with the six horned fiends we've been herding since yesterday. It could also be the giggling fits we had while watching horrible movies (ever see The Ruins? Don't. Man-eating plants do not make for compelling horror anymore, Ben Stiller. Way to produce a movie). We were up until 3:30AM and up again less than six hours later with a hungry horde to feed.
Oh, sure. You may be very jealous that she's been able to spend this much time with yours truly. Two whole days with The Maven is the stuff legends are made of! But she's also seen the ugly side of me: the racoon eyes after my makeup runs at the beach, the grunts and morning shuffle to the coffee maker (that I taught her how to use - she doesn't drink coffee! I've curbed my prejudice in this one case and have accepted her presence despite that glaring character flaw), the need to check for blog comments three times the day to confirm that I am loved and frequently read (only five people have loved me in the last 48 hours). There are so many things that make me unbearably... me. Temporarily shacking up with me makes these glaringly obvious.
Maybe Geekster hired her to do away with me in my sleep and she was too tired to pull it off yesterday. According to reports from my husband this morning, he was given a new laptop from work yesterday and is enjoying the quiet time setting it up.
That could be code for 'porn', but I'm more inclined to think otherwise. Geekster is all about the dual boot partitions for Linux and Windows. That's way sexier than naked ladies to him.
Well, not really, but it's a close race. Maybe he'll set it up and then check out the nakedness.
No weight report today. I dare not weigh myself after last night's popcorn and chocolate incident. Let's pretend that my lack of sleep means I burned more calories alongside constant giggling over flesh-munching plants in horrid films.
Yeah, that's it.
I should probably go help her clean or parent my kids or something. That would be the right thing to do.
... So I'll check Facebook first.