Happy almost Canadian Thanksgiving!
I'm sure you're expecting the usual "I'm grateful for friends, family and renewable energy" type stuff, but that's so O Magazine. Obviously I'm grateful for those. I'm not an asshole.
... Although it was a little asshole-ish of me to use the term "asshole" in a gratitude list before Thanksgiving. Or for me to insinuate that you're insinuating I am one.
Anyway, let's stop questioning my word usage and move on, shall we?
12 Ways I'm Gobbling Up the Gratitude:
1. I'm grateful that, at 36, I have a pretty good grasp of who I am: my strengths (numerous), shortcomings (far more numerous), and amazing hair (if I use the right products). It takes a lot more to shake my confidence these days, and I don't need nearly as much approval as I used to even a couple of years ago.
2. I'm thankful to know when I'm lying to myself. Like just now. I was spewing forth falsehoods. I actually do still feast on your approval, but I like to pretend I don't because it makes me seem more confident. Please feel free to take pity on me and pile some love on my plate. Leave a comment, retweet or share a post, pull my hair, throw a shoe at me... anything. Just let me know I exist in your world, ok? It's lonely here, all by myself.
3. Grateful that therapists are heartily compensated via my spouse's insurance. Three guesses why this is a good thing.
4. I no longer equate "healthy" with "skinny." This was the best gift I could ever give myself other than Johnny Depp in a cake. Healthy comes in many different sizes. If I eat good food and exercise and get enough sleep, I'm probably pretty healthy. If that results in a smaller size, so be it. If not, I still feel fabulous. I still rock the skin I'm in. I still love myself immensely. Immensely.
5. I was really happy to find out this year that I am not, in fact, a narcissist. (See the end of gratitude point #4 for an example of why this was a concern.) According to the internet and one therapist I cornered while she was not doing therapy (and who is not my therapist and actually doesn't really know me at all), I'm probably just a little self-centered sometimes, and that's not always a bad thing. It's okay to be a kinda into me because I'm really great-- Oh, get this: but not greater than everyone else. There. See? Totally healthy. Not a narcissist.
6. Coffee does not contain any gluten. Enough said.
7. Every six months, Gutsy and Intrepid pick out new hearing aid moulds - the soft plastic part that goes in the ear. Gutsy always picks out really awesome colours; this time it was a neon blue. The boys are totally comfortable with their hearing loss. They don't try to hide it, and, in fact, are happy to educate anyone who asks. I'm grateful for confident kids. I'm always learning to be a better human through them.
8. When the dog threw up all over the carpet last week, I'm thankful Geekster found it and not me.
9. Speaking of my spouse, I'm grateful he hasn't takenZoidberg Fred downstairs to his soon-to-be studio. In fact, the ungrateful (so unseasonal, right?) guy stuck him on top of a shelf in the living room "until the room is finished", where he is collecting dust as we speak. Never mind him, Fred. You're going to have your own chaise when Geekster moves out of my office; the type people buy for their overpriced poodles. And you can help me write screenplays. I'll carry you up to collect the Emmy and everything. We can fit you with a little lobster-sized tux. Seriously adorbs.
10. Kinda glad these chocolate-covered raisins are gluten-free too...
11. Grateful for this blog. It's done all sorts of awesome things for me in the last six-and-a-half years. Having this platform to rant, cry, commiserate, communicate, evaluate, and grow with has been life-changing. And I'm not even being dramatic right now. I'm reaching out, here folks. I'm trying to touch you. Oh, don't act like you don't like it.
12. Very grateful that, even though it's 2012, I only have to come up with twelve things to be thankful for and not, like, two-thousand-and-twelve. That's do-it-yourself lobotomy territory, right there.
Happy Thanksgiving, Canadians. And happy All-The-Stores-In-Your-Area-Will-Be-Open Day to everyone else.
I'm sure you're expecting the usual "I'm grateful for friends, family and renewable energy" type stuff, but that's so O Magazine. Obviously I'm grateful for those. I'm not an asshole.
... Although it was a little asshole-ish of me to use the term "asshole" in a gratitude list before Thanksgiving. Or for me to insinuate that you're insinuating I am one.
Anyway, let's stop questioning my word usage and move on, shall we?
12 Ways I'm Gobbling Up the Gratitude:
1. I'm grateful that, at 36, I have a pretty good grasp of who I am: my strengths (numerous), shortcomings (far more numerous), and amazing hair (if I use the right products). It takes a lot more to shake my confidence these days, and I don't need nearly as much approval as I used to even a couple of years ago.
2. I'm thankful to know when I'm lying to myself. Like just now. I was spewing forth falsehoods. I actually do still feast on your approval, but I like to pretend I don't because it makes me seem more confident. Please feel free to take pity on me and pile some love on my plate. Leave a comment, retweet or share a post, pull my hair, throw a shoe at me... anything. Just let me know I exist in your world, ok? It's lonely here, all by myself.
3. Grateful that therapists are heartily compensated via my spouse's insurance. Three guesses why this is a good thing.
4. I no longer equate "healthy" with "skinny." This was the best gift I could ever give myself other than Johnny Depp in a cake. Healthy comes in many different sizes. If I eat good food and exercise and get enough sleep, I'm probably pretty healthy. If that results in a smaller size, so be it. If not, I still feel fabulous. I still rock the skin I'm in. I still love myself immensely. Immensely.
5. I was really happy to find out this year that I am not, in fact, a narcissist. (See the end of gratitude point #4 for an example of why this was a concern.) According to the internet and one therapist I cornered while she was not doing therapy (and who is not my therapist and actually doesn't really know me at all), I'm probably just a little self-centered sometimes, and that's not always a bad thing. It's okay to be a kinda into me because I'm really great-- Oh, get this: but not greater than everyone else. There. See? Totally healthy. Not a narcissist.
6. Coffee does not contain any gluten. Enough said.
7. Every six months, Gutsy and Intrepid pick out new hearing aid moulds - the soft plastic part that goes in the ear. Gutsy always picks out really awesome colours; this time it was a neon blue. The boys are totally comfortable with their hearing loss. They don't try to hide it, and, in fact, are happy to educate anyone who asks. I'm grateful for confident kids. I'm always learning to be a better human through them.
8. When the dog threw up all over the carpet last week, I'm thankful Geekster found it and not me.
9. Speaking of my spouse, I'm grateful he hasn't taken
10. Kinda glad these chocolate-covered raisins are gluten-free too...
11. Grateful for this blog. It's done all sorts of awesome things for me in the last six-and-a-half years. Having this platform to rant, cry, commiserate, communicate, evaluate, and grow with has been life-changing. And I'm not even being dramatic right now. I'm reaching out, here folks. I'm trying to touch you. Oh, don't act like you don't like it.
12. Very grateful that, even though it's 2012, I only have to come up with twelve things to be thankful for and not, like, two-thousand-and-twelve. That's do-it-yourself lobotomy territory, right there.
Happy Thanksgiving, Canadians. And happy All-The-Stores-In-Your-Area-Will-Be-Open Day to everyone else.