Mr. Maven Celebrates his Birthday

Dearest Geekster,

Today I stood in the kitchen for several hours and cooked for you. I made you quiche with homemade crust with these weird little carrot balls lovingly steamed in the microwave.

For you I baked a lovely lemon poppyseed coffee cake, which I screwed up royally even though it came out of a box, and then had to smother with homemade icing to hide it. But whatever. It was kind of good. if you got beyond the tough outer shell, right? Kind of like me. Yes. Yes, it was symbolism, you see. It symbolized your love for me, as it should on your birthday.

For you I collaborated to buy you the

best.

birthday.

gift.

ever.

which you do not have in your posession just yet because it is at my parents' house awaiting your parents' arrival on the weekend (they paid for half) and, while you think you might know what it is, you will be blown away when you see just how far my love reaches. I really am that awesome to be married to! You're so freaking lucky!

For you I have given my love and devotion, I have given my vows, I have given my body for three babies, and I have given my virgitinity.

...Forget that last part. I got carried away for a second, there. The other stuff is all true, though.

Happy birthday, my wonderful Geekster, you gorgeous creature, computer nerd extraordinaire, man with brain on 'roids, maker of banana bread and meatless chili, co-creator of the gremlins three, husband to one amazing woman.

I love you so much I'm going to stop blogging now and go to bed to read my book and snuggle with you on your birthday, because I know that's what you want more than anything.

Yes. A book and a snuggle. Hey, didn't you see the virgin part up there? What do you expect from someone so chaste and pure? Kissing with tongues? Ew!