I woke up excited this morning.For one, I'm at my lowest weight yet: 241.4lbs. It's not a huge change, but it's in the right direction.
My second piece of news is far more interesting if not short lived: I get to work at a carnival today. Well, a fair, but that's a boring word. I like carnival better.
Thus, I am officially going to be a carny. I've never been more eager to have a title in my entire life.
That may have something to do with the type of titles I have, such as "recovering alcoholic", or "overwhelmed mother" or "unpublished writer." Not exactly mount-on-your-wall, pride-filled titles. Although, to be honest, I'd rather have "recovering" before "alcoholic" any day, and motherhood suits me, even if I am overwhelmed at times (like last night when I stalked out of the house after I spent over an hour cooking dinner only to hear "I don't like this!" over and over - "Abandoning mother" maybe?)
But now I get to take on a wondrous new adventure. I get to become a carnival worker, which is so vastly different from the humdrum of my average day that I can't wait to run off to the country, grab my weekend pass and get to work.
Like any new position in life one must do some research. I read up on carnies and came to the following conclusions:
- I am a greeny. I'll be a new employee for a short time (two days).
- I'll be working a sugar shack (A concession or food-stand that doubles as a front for drug commerce & trafficking). Well, not really. At least I hope not. I'd rather not be asking "Would you like crack with that?" when people order their burgers. But since I can't find any slang for food-stand, I'm going to call it a sugar shack.
- I wonder if the chip truck I'm working at will have a possum belly? (sometimes possum gut) compartment under a truck or trailer). And if so, will I fall so hard that I become a possum belly queen? (A girl who would have sex in a possum belly)
Oh, not I. I'm no lot lizard (Describes a carny (usually female) who has multiple sexual partners (also carnys) Or one who tends to "sleep-around" or cheat with other carnies on the lot). Would Mr. Squid Tentacles hold me the way Geekster does? Could the Fire Breathing Moustache Man kiss me the same? Nay, I say.
At the end of my wild and crazy stint as a carny, I'll leave "the life" behind as I crawl back into my normal, suburban mom routine.
Although, before I come home, I may partake in some raw fish with Mr. Squid if he can keep his roaming tentacles to himself. Pervert.