My Foray into Educating the Internet
I don't like to argue on the internet much. Years of being a mom has taught me that nobody is going to change the type of diaper they use just because someone else disagrees with their choice on a message board.
This one was really thoughtful. I felt like she was just trying to help in her own little judgmental way. Maybe Mary is that busybody woman in church who likes to take the other parishioners aside to discuss how short Abigail's dress is. And did you see her husband? I think he's... straying.
Of course, Mary would never say anything to Abigail. That would just be rude. But on the internet? Well, on the internet, Mary will just tell it like it is. That's the power of being online. It's like giving the car in front of you the long-honk. You would never be so bold with that person if they were standing in front of you. But behind the wheel, or a keyboard? Mary's going to let them have it. Abigail, your dress is too short and your husband is a douche. Amanda, your daughter is mentally ill. I don't know her at all and have only read 6 sentences about her life, but I'm ready to make my diagnosis.
But every now and then, something amazing happens, like this:
OMG. Christmas came early.
I felt like I had been given the most glorious gift. It might as well have had an LED bow on top. This can't be a real person, right? I mean, nobody would actually be so... but they would, wouldn't they? Because internet. I pulled Geekster over to the computer at eleven last night and showed him the glory that is Joseph. We stared in awe at both the content and its poetic delivery.
Where you do start on this one? I'll tell you where: You immediately adopt the word "cripalities" into your vocabulary. We tried to fit it into every sentence we could:
"Honey, would your cripalities prevent you from making us a snack?"
"Cripalities aside, I think Montreal has a good shot at the cup this year."
"Joseph isn't sure which 'your/you're' to use. That's a serious grammatical cripality that I'm trying to be respectful of."
His comment is just the gift that keeps on giving. A guy who isn't a parent giving me parenting advice, lecturing me about God and suggesting that transgender issues are the result of spoiling children? Pure gold. This is not a comment. It's a work of art.
I've been talking to Gutsy a lot about judgement and hate, and how there will always be people who won't understand her or anyone else who doesn't fit the "norm". We've discussed how hate has nothing to do with the person being hated and everything to do with the person doing the hating. Thankfully, she finds internet trolls amusing, and knows that the vast majority of people support her brave decision to live an authentic life. The girl is positively surrounded by love.
We've tried to teach our children that knowledge is power. The more knowledge you have, the more you can use it to defend yourself and get your point across without stooping the other person's level. A tactful delivery is everything. So instead of ignoring Joseph or lashing out at him, I chose this route:
But there are occasionally times when I simply can't pass up the opportunity, like yesterday.
This week, Rochester, NY radio show hosts Kimberly and Beck
were fired after making some derogatory and, at times, outright hateful comments about the transgender community.
After listening to the clip (which was awful), I immediately emailed the radio station. I didn't ask for them to be fired, but instead talked a little about my daughter and the uphill battle she faces. I asked for them to look into education and sensitivity training for their staff - particularly their morning show hosts. I even sent them a piece I recently wrote about raising a trans* child, with permission to use it in-house. But the station made the decision to fire the hosts, in part because this wasn't the first time they'd stepped way over the line.
Naturally, some of their listeners and longtime fans are upset. They
took to Facebook to declare their emancipation from the station, screaming that they'll find somewhere else to take their ears. But there were others, too. who left comments cheering on the company's supportive stance on LGBT rights. I was one of those people.
Overall, my comment was well-received. People are learning about transgender issues, and their views are changing.
But then the trolls started to trickle in. That was to be expected.
This one was really thoughtful. I felt like she was just trying to help in her own little judgmental way. Maybe Mary is that busybody woman in church who likes to take the other parishioners aside to discuss how short Abigail's dress is. And did you see her husband? I think he's... straying.
Of course, Mary would never say anything to Abigail. That would just be rude. But on the internet? Well, on the internet, Mary will just tell it like it is. That's the power of being online. It's like giving the car in front of you the long-honk. You would never be so bold with that person if they were standing in front of you. But behind the wheel, or a keyboard? Mary's going to let them have it. Abigail, your dress is too short and your husband is a douche. Amanda, your daughter is mentally ill. I don't know her at all and have only read 6 sentences about her life, but I'm ready to make my diagnosis.
But every now and then, something amazing happens, like this:
OMG. Christmas came early.
I felt like I had been given the most glorious gift. It might as well have had an LED bow on top. This can't be a real person, right? I mean, nobody would actually be so... but they would, wouldn't they? Because internet. I pulled Geekster over to the computer at eleven last night and showed him the glory that is Joseph. We stared in awe at both the content and its poetic delivery.
Where you do start on this one? I'll tell you where: You immediately adopt the word "cripalities" into your vocabulary. We tried to fit it into every sentence we could:
"Honey, would your cripalities prevent you from making us a snack?"
"Cripalities aside, I think Montreal has a good shot at the cup this year."
"Joseph isn't sure which 'your/you're' to use. That's a serious grammatical cripality that I'm trying to be respectful of."
His comment is just the gift that keeps on giving. A guy who isn't a parent giving me parenting advice, lecturing me about God and suggesting that transgender issues are the result of spoiling children? Pure gold. This is not a comment. It's a work of art.
I've been talking to Gutsy a lot about judgement and hate, and how there will always be people who won't understand her or anyone else who doesn't fit the "norm". We've discussed how hate has nothing to do with the person being hated and everything to do with the person doing the hating. Thankfully, she finds internet trolls amusing, and knows that the vast majority of people support her brave decision to live an authentic life. The girl is positively surrounded by love.
We've tried to teach our children that knowledge is power. The more knowledge you have, the more you can use it to defend yourself and get your point across without stooping the other person's level. A tactful delivery is everything. So instead of ignoring Joseph or lashing out at him, I chose this route:
Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go find some Barbies and twigs to help me with my obvious parenting cripalities.