Dear Husband,

Happy Valentine's Day! I wanted to be extra romantic this year, so here are some of the things I've done today in the name of our love:

I had a shower - a long one, with a smell test afterwards and everything.  I shaved my wintery armpits so they no longer resemble a baby gorilla's forehead. Best. Gift. Ever.

I vacuumed all the dog hair! Well, most of the dog hair. Ok, only the stuff on the main floor, but first impressions are everything, right? You'll be so blinded by the clean floors in the front hall that you won't even notice the balls of fur collecting on your feet as you walk up the stairs and make your way to the bedroom later. Sasquatch lovin'.

You know all the toys and art supplies the boys leave all over the living room? The ones that drive you crazy because there never seems to be a spot for them? I sorted them and put them away! And by "sorted" I mean "thrown into a basket" and by "put away" I mean "stuffed precariously in the corner of the living room". It's like our very own plastic leaning Tower of Pisa.

I created art for you! See above paragraph.

I ate all the Reece's Pieces a few minutes ago so you wouldn't be tempted to eat them later. I care about your health goals.

Finally, I wrote you a few poems. I can't decide which one is my favourite:

Roses are red

Daisies are yellow,

Come sit next to me,

You fine fellow

#BustAMove

Are you happy to see me?

Hey, what's in your pocket?

Oh, is that what it was?

I'd hoped it was chocolate. :(

Roses are red,

Coffee is brown,

Brew me a cup,

Or I'll never go down

You can pick your favourite and we'll have it tattooed on your fine self.

You lucky, lucky bastard.

Love,

Maven