Yesterday I made a deal to buy some used winter tires from a really nice family. I saw their ad online, emailed them, spoke to the husband, agreed on a price and confirmed that those were, indeed, the size of tire my van used.

Then, two hours later, I emailed him again to tell him that I was wrong and that I actually needed a bigger size, that I am a giant dumbass and that I hope he gets another buyer for his tires ASAP.

Basically, I wasted this couple's time because I never bothered to double check the size I needed before jumping in with both feet. Nice of me, right? Right. Dragging other people down with impulsivity is what Mavens do best.

Wouldn't you know that today, less than 24 hours later, the Karma Monster would appear and give me a good dose of you-shoulda-known-better. I knew it would come in some form, but expected salmonella or something instead of what I actually received. Instead of puking my face off, I came home to find a special surprise in my inbox.

My favourite blog stalker is back with a different yet frightingly similar biblical name. I've reported him to Blogger twice and he has switched accounts at least that many times so that he may hound me and other 12 step people who blog. This time he made 22 spammy comments on my last post because he thinks it will make me stop going to AA meetings, which will invariably save my soul from the devil.

Apparently AA meetings turn members into zombies that drool and stink and yet somehow have the brain capacity to kick Jesus to the spiritual curb and worship the devil. Allegedly, if you turn your life over to a Christian lifestyle (I'm guessing his idea of Christianity, which is a special version reserved for crazies), God will miraculously cure your alcoholism and you'll never have a drinking problem again. Better yet, you don't have to become a shape-shifting reptile (he really did call me that once) with a forking tongue and a penchant for virginal sacrifices.

I know my skin is a little dry in the winter, but I wouldn't go so far as to say I'm reptilian. And about the closest thing I have to shape-shifting powers would be a nifty ability to change my undies every day.

But the thing is I really like AA. It's kept me clean and sober for over 17 years. And another thing: I'm *gasp!* not religious. Yeah, that's right: I went there. I do not worship any particular deity or any deity's family members. I am a spiritual human being who, get this - and I learned this in an evil 12 step program - I can respect other people's beliefs, too!

So, even though I think my stalker is a few fries short of a Happy Meal, I respect his beliefs. I do not, however, have to like his spam. Therefore, I have now turned on comment moderating. So, while I might have to endure his psychotic ramblings hidden behind biblical quotes, you will not.

You're welcome.

Now I am, ironically, off to a meeting.

(Also, Americans, if you like me and you want me to keep liking you, you'll vote Obama tomorrow. Kthxbi!)