Hey Kids!

Feeling bored in your humdrum life? Is everything going exactly the way it should and you need a little excitement?

Well, look no further!

Spawnling Infections Inc. is pleased to announce its third ear infection in a single month. That's right: the third! Unlike the first two this one comes on fast and furious, like the street racing movie but physically painful rather than just painful to watch. It will land you into the local children's hospital emergency room very early Monday morning faster than you can say "Damnit! Not another fever!"

Ear Infection #3 is bound to keep your life in constant flux. You'll be throwing out old antibiotic bottles on your way to the pharmacy to pick up a new one! And sleep? Forget sleep! Sleep is predictable and boring. This is about living life on the edge with a miserable toddler who screams while clutching his ear and wants "Mama" and only "Mama". Especially Mama's boobs. It's almost enough to make even the most committed extended breastfeeder wonder why she hasn't considered weaning just yet.

But wait: there's more! To throw some extra chaos into the mix, we'll add in a plethora of appointments for your other two children over the course of this week. Hearing aid adjustments, dentist checkups and a once-in-a-lifetime workshop for your eleven-year-old budding writer! All things you know you can't or shouldn't miss. Imagine dragging your grumpy toddler to and from all these fun activities. You'll never be bored again!

(Except when you can't go to any fun things like playgroup or get-togethers because Spawnling needs to stay away from other people until he makes a full recovery *sigh*)

Thankfully, this deal comes with a large skinny vanilla latte picked up after five hours of broken sleep and the hospital trip. It also makes for a lively 300th post for the blog. Yes, 300 posts. Imagine!

I've realized I don't even have a "theme" to my blog. You know how most people have some kind of direction? They can say "I have a recovery blog" or "I have a weight loss blog" or "I have a stalker blog that looks just like your blog" or whatever. What do I have? I have a parenting/recovery/ranting/infertility/fertility/extremely random blog.

It makes no sense. I make no sense. My children's crazy infections make no sense. I think I'll just keep it this way. Screw the themes. I'm a rebel.

A little bit of good news: Geekster and I had our first date since August thanks to the amazing Jobthingy and her sidekick Speedy. In the window between Ear Infection 2.0 and Ear Infection 3.0 we were able to go out and be a - gasp! - couple.

Geekster and I were able to do neat things like grownup people's hands (each others', not random stranger hands) and look at each other and not need to ask anyone to get-out-from-under-the-table -for-the-love-of-God-we're -just-trying-to-enjoy-our-meals-guys. We had coffee in a real coffee shop where they sell local art. Breakable art. I do not bring my children to places where I would need to cash in my retirement fund to pay for things they would inevitably break. Finally, we went to the library and did not head directly into the children's section. The non-children section was otherworldly. I had no idea it even existed.

Having had that reprieve (and a promise from Jobthingy to allow us a reprieve every month) rejuvenated me enough enough to be able to handle this new ear infection. I truly believe I would be a basket case today had it not been for Thursday's date. I owe Jobthingy a coffee when my Spawn is not oozing out his ear. There's something about ear ooze that makes the coffee drinking experience less appetizing.

I leave you with pictures taken while we were out. Jobthingy would like to point out that Intrepid is not in the ditch. He just looks like he is but he's not because everyone knows I don't allow him in the ditch and therefore he couldn't possibly be in it. A trick of the eyes, that's all.